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I bet you look good on the dancefloor......

It's amazing how when you're single "again" after becoming separated, your view on who you are and how you look completely changes.

You could be the most confident person in the world when you're married, but then when you're alone again, you start to question how other people see you in your new phase of life.

I am definitely not looking to start up in a relationship anytime soon, but one does often think......ok, what next?? What does the future hold for me?? I've experienced such a huge loss with my marriage not working out that one becomes a little.......skeptical.....and jaded.

"Babe!!  You're HOT!  You'll totally meet someone again!  Someone AMAZING!"
I roll my eyes at my friend and crack open a beer.
"You've got to be kidding me!!"  I say  "Ladies....as you ALL know.....I'm now 30-mrph years old.  I'm over the hill. I'm DONE-ZO!!!"
"Your age doesn't MATTER!!  Guys don't care!"  they all yell simultaneously.
"Ok, WHATEVER!"  I yell back, chugging my Moosehead.
"It's true!  Guys don't care if you're 20 or 40.  If they think you're hot and they want you, then they'll make a move!" says my beautiful little blonde friend who always shines with her logical voice.


We decide to test our theory out.

The following Saturday,  the girls and I go clubbing.  We are all in our 30's....most of us moms.....some of us married.  I'm thinking we're GONERS tonight.

We're standing outside in the VIP line when it begins.......
"Hey ladies......"  a boy in front  of us says in a sly voice.
"Oh sweetie, how old are you?" I politely ask, with my head cocked to one side.
"Does it matter?" he answers "How old are you guys?"
My BFF starts laughing  "Oh honey....you wouldn't know what to do with us!"

We make our way inside.  We aren't even at coat check yet when a sea starts parting for us to walk through.    All the men on either side of us are raising their eyebrows and smiling and trying to grab our hands as we're walking through the crowd.

What the hell is going on??  Are they looking at US??

A few drinks later, we form our usual "dance circle" and I'm watching the crowd.  It's unbelievable how these guys work.  No shame.  No intimidation.  They just go for it.  My girls were right.....age CLEARLY doesn't matter!

"Well.....hellloooooo"  a cute 20-something is suddenly standing inches from my face.
"No."  I quickly say.
"No??"
"No."
"C'mon!!!"
"No"
"I don't like no's...." he says with a smirk.
"No hon.  Sorry" 
Never one to make someone feel bad, I add the "sorry" in hopes that he won't take it too personally.  He finally gives up and dances out of sight.

"Geeze!! what's with these guys??"  I yell into my friend's ear.
"I know!  That one guy just grabbed my hand to check for a wedding band!  And then I think he copped a feel!!!"

Suddenly some tall guy is all over my sister.  My sister, who is gorgeous and looks like a fricken' supermodel, dances away from him.  He dances after her.  She spins behind me.....he loops around and meets her face to face.  She's pinching my arm trying to get my help.  I'm loving this!  I leave her to fend for herself.  She's tough.  She'll figure it out.   

Then I see the tall guy's short friend, wearing a ridiculous long scarf, hanging off my BFF.  He is literally "koala-ing" my best friend!  I start laughing so hard while my sister is yelling "We HAVE to save her!"
"No!  Let it happen!  This is HILARIOUS!"  I yell.

My sister (who weighs no more than a chihuahua), steps right up to the guy and starts yelling "TOO AGGRESSIVE!!  YOU ARE BEING TOO AGGRESSIVE!!!"
At this point, I am doubled over in laughter as this snake has wrapped himself around my poor best friend who is laughing, but yelling "Stop laughing and save me you losers!"

Shortly after,  I see my other friend pointing a finger at yet another guy who is attacking HER sister!  She's shaking her head and yelling "UH-UH!  UH-UH!  Back off!!  That's my little sister!!"

I feel like we're a group of gazelles all being stalked by lions.  I wonder.....if I throw a steak in the middle of the dancefloor, will they leave us and go after it?


By the end of the night, I start scanning the club.  Many people have hooked up.  Everyone is utterly wasted.  And I'm pretty sure several babies were conceived on the dancefloor that night.

Well.....I have to say.....it did feel good getting all that attention.  It's not like I met my future "soul mate" or anything.....but it did make me feel like there's hope! 

And then just as we're about to leave........there is one more attempt on our group.  But this time, it's different. 

This guy is .... handsome ....really handsome. 
He looks over at me, and we lock eyes.  A few minutes later, he starts walking towards me, we're staring at eachother the entire time.  I start getting nervous.

My girls, who are oblivious to all this, are grabbing their purses and heading towards the door to leave.  I look at him and smile........but then I walk after my girls.

"Wait!  What's your name?"  he calls after me.

I look back, still smiling, but I don't say anything.  I just keep walking.

"Will I see you again?"  he asks hopefully

God he's gorgeous.

"Maybe...."   I answer

Urgh!  Why am I leaving??

I turn back towards my friends and head for the door.

But I can't help it.

I look back.

He's standing there.  Staring at me.  With the sexiest grin ever.

Damn!!!

It would've been so much cooler if I didn't look back!



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